Pret~Edition

I find this atmosphere very familiar and close kind off. I do feel comfortable at times. I don't have any problem, though there are issues keep rising in my mind. My ego wants to enter in me. Always knocking at my mind and heart. Sensitivity wait's to turn off, had already faced many pains and there is no more space left with in to take more of concern and thought process to run on. Ask me to sort out. Be tough. Top of that, ask me to take action against every single thing of my mind and body cannot resist. Because it says 'you are sensitive and just lagging in this world to live'. But you deserve something better and even best at times.

Many people came and went in the name of friends. But hardly can I recollect they asked me how you are? Feel like a moderator. And a global friend sector, where every one speak to you and share things but at the end of the day, I feel that was not my time to open my part of book. When time comes, they isolate those selves and I am left alone.

No body feels ashamed to lie me. Even they do call up on for meeting at their convenience. But u know something, 'I can not do that'. Just because am the global friend sector. I feel ashamed of being the part of such kind of pathetic friendship. I can not find and see them opening there mind and heart, talking freely and frankly with each other. They keep an ego first and speak. Or something related to past and come for a fast friendship. Try to be smart and name them as Pals.

Now I really want to isolate my self. No one respects me. I hate people lying. I never do to anyone. At least after sitting in this friends sector I never do so. I want to take away my self from this artificial atmosphere. Where I can not trust my ride am riding on with. Where people are binding them self to some vulgar thoughts and live in a way where they just pretend do be so good but they are just hiding there originality and finally becomes the cause to do backbiting.

I find this atmosphere lost. It always forgets to give breeze to my lungs. Am not satisfied how much it pumps now. I want to change it entirely. Can live alone but not in this kind of suffocation. Where you are surrounded by people and friends every time and feel damn alone, as you are shouting …shouting and no one could listen you , because they are busy in weaving there own artificial atmosphere and top of that listing to others point of views "if they are happy with that let them be. Or else one says, ‘anyone can live as they want”. Every time trying to prove there point which is factually no point.